Wednesday, March 31, 2010

The Corporate Language

"We will do it"
"You will do it"

"You have done a great job"
"More work to be given to you"

"We are working on it"
"We have not yet started working on the same"

"Tomorrow first thing in the morning"
"Its not getting done... At least not tomorrow !".

"After discussion we will decide - I am very open to views"
"I have already decided, I will tell you what to do"

"There was a slight miscommunication"
"We had actually lied"

"Lets call a meeting and discuss"
"I have no time now, will talk later"

"We can always do it"
"We actually cannot do the same on time"

"We are on the right track but there needs to be a slight extension of the deadline"
"The project is screwed up, we cannot deliver on time."

"We had slight differences of opinion"
"We had actually fought"

"Make a list of the work that you do and let's see how I can help you"
"Anyway you have to find a way out no help from me"

"You should have told me earlier"
"Well even if you told me earlier that would have made hardly any difference!"

"We need to find out the real reason"
"Well I will tell you where your fault is"

"Well... family is important, your leave is always granted. Just ensure that the work is not affected"
"Well you know..."

"We are a team"
"I am not the only one to be blamed"

"That's actually a good question"
"I do not know anything about it"

"All the Best"
"You are in trouble"

Monday, March 8, 2010

Amazing Facts

1. Apples, not caffeine, are more efficient at waking you up in the morning.

2. Alfred Hitchcock didn't have a belly button.

3. A pack-a-day smoker will lose approximately 2 teeth every 10 years.

4. People do not get sick from cold weather; it's from being indoors a lot more.

5. When you sneeze, all bodily functions stop, even your heart!

6. Only 7 per cent of the population are lefties.

7. Forty people are sent to the hospital for dog bites every minute.

8. Babies are born without kneecaps. They don't appear until they are 2-6  years old.

9. The average person over 50 will have spent 5 years waiting in lines.

10. The toothbrush was invented in 1498.

11. The average housefly lives for one month.

12. 40,000 Americans are injured by toilets each year.

13. A coat hanger is 44 inches long when straightened.

14. The average computer user blinks 7 times a minute.

15. Your feet are bigger in the afternoon than any other time of day.

16. Most of us have eaten a spider in our sleep.

17. The REAL reason ostriches stick their head in the sand is to search for water.

18. The only two animals that can see behind themselves without turning their heads are the
rabbit and the parrot.

19. John Travolta turned down the starring roles in "An Officer and a Gentleman" and "Tootsie."

20. Michael Jackson owns the rights to the South Carolina State Anthem.

21. Most television commercials advertising milk, a mixture of white paint and a little thinner is used in place of the milk.

22. Prince Charles and Prince William NEVER travel on the same airplane, just in case there is a crash.

23. The first Harley Davidson motorcycle built in 1903 used a tomato can for a carburetor.

24. Most hospitals make money by selling the umbilical cords cut from women who give birth. They are used in vein transplant surgery.

25. Humphrey Bogart was related to Princess Diana. They were 7th cousins.

26. If coloring weren't added to Coca-Cola, it would be green. Would  it then be called Greenola?

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Correct Timing to Drink Water

Two glasses of water - After waking up - Helps activate internal organs

One glass of water - 30 minutes before meal - Help digestion

One glass of water - Before taking a bath - Helps lower blood pressure

One glass of water - Before sleep - To avoid stroke or heart attack